Some things happen for a reason

Everytime I sit down to write this blog, there seems to more and more happening. I guess that's life, but personally, I am waiting for things to even out or slow down.


My last blog was more about my cultural impressions of the big D, but this one will be more about what has been happening in this little thing called, "my life".


So I was working for a family in Germany as an au pair. For those of you who know, I was pretty excited to be working with this particular family because of what they were willing to offer and because they seemed like very pleasant people. I started work with a lot of enthusiam to do things to the best of my ability. It wasn't that I was so stoked with the idea that I was using a BA degree and international experience to serve other people who have the money to hire servants...BUT, Rolf and I were able to live in the apartment that they furnished for us for free, I was getting paid, and it was a sure way for me to be able to stay in Germany with Rolf. It seemed too good to be true and that's exactly how it turned out to be, just worse.


Things with the family did not go well from the beginning. They pretty much handed me their car keys and told me to go. They never sat down with me once to explain what they needed from me, when and where I supposed to take the kids and from where I was supposed to pick them up. I guess they assumed I would just know their life as well as they did.


The only communication I ever had with them was through SMS or text. I would learn what I was supposed to do each day only moments, literally, before I was to begin with my tasks.


Everyone wants to know, how were the kids????


What do you think?! They were awful! Sure, they are just kiddos, but I have had a decent amount of exposure to the youth and I have never come across such spoild brats. It's really a shame to see them having no friends and demanding things the way they did with me. It was a shame to see them hardly ever laugh or have fun and to ask every night, "who will bring me to bed tonight?"


I'm a pretty likable person....I have friends and I get along with people. I was never able to make a connection with these people as much as I tried.


That's fine though. Not everyone becomes best friends and I began to accept that. But everyday I was becoming increasingly more frustrated with the last minute demands from the parents and staying at their home until late into the night several times a week. Something which was never agreed upon and something that was told differently to me from the get-go.


I was coming home every night, late, more upset than the day before.


After already 2 months, they told me that my "probationary" period was over and I was to begin the real work. I was shocked. I was already working for them and we had already agreed that I would be their au pair. They became more discourteous to me and I became more disinterested in doing anything to help them. The "real" work included me driving to Austria every Friday to drop the kids off and their weekend house and wait for their au pair in Austria to relieve me or wait for the parents to arrive in Austria. With the track record that they had shown me in regards to being "on-time", I was sure that I wouldn't even see my weekend. Instead, I would be on standby in Austria.


I was furious. I didn't even have my visa through them yet and I didn't have proper insurance that would cover me for driving either. Besides the legal and safety factors, in principal they were taking advantage of me and my dependence upon them.



It all came to a screeching halt when the parents left for Thailand. I was to juggle the responsibilities with the grandmother who also happened to be our landlord and a total bitch. She would toss the keys at me, never make any eye contact, just as though I had done something terrible to her in a past life.



I had just returned home from my language class and was using the restroom. I was home alone and I didn't shut the door. Then I heard a knock. I didn't answer because I was busy, obviously. Then moments later after the knock, the door lock clicked and the front door was opening........(The bathroom door is directly facing the front door by the way).....I yelled: Excuse me, I'm using the restroom!!!! Guess who it was??? Right! The damn grandmother! I quickly shut the door and told her that I would be out in a moment. I was shocked (again). Once I finished washing my hands, I opened the bathroom door to see the front door wide open and the grandmother was standing there waiting for me! She began to scold me. I didn't buy one of the kids a pretzel in the morning for him to take to school because the parents left for Thailand without leaving me any money for their kids. They had expected me to pay and I wasn't for that. She was upset because he "didn't have anything to eat alllllllllday."

Mind you that he goes to school from 8am to 12pm. A whole four hours.

She was shaking in anger and intentionally had brought the kid with her so that she could yell at me in front of him. Real appropriate. Everytime I tried to interject, I was ran over with her lecture. So I said sorry and then she threw the keys at me, demanded I leave to pick up the other kid and stormed out.

I was, again, furious.



Then I found out that I was to drive the kids to Austria on Friday which I had to tried to explain to them would not be a wise idea nor was it something that I was willing to do. I sent an email professionally explaining my reasoning.



I never heard anything back, but then received a SMS that wasn't meant to be sent to me. It was meant to be sent to the grandmother from the mother. It said that she wanted to kick me out.



And that's what happened.



About thirty minutes after I got that message, the father called me and told me that I was fired. He was actually yelling and saying things like: I never want to see you again. I never want to have anything to do with you. You're MY au pair. I'll call the police and have your things thrown out.



It really sounded as though he was foaming at the mouth. I had actually planned on quitting anyways, but I was irrate when he said that I have 48 hours to leave the apartment.



There certainly was no reason for that.....No matter what. After several minutes of him yelling through the phone and me not being able to get a single word in, I just hung up. That's when I broke down. I was shaking with anger and I was scared. I never could have expected this and never experienced such hostility from someone I barely knew. Like I said, I was going to quit anyways. Rolf and I were doing everything we could to prepare for that too. We already had scheduled to look at apartments that week and we went ahead and got a visa without the help of the family. Everything was prepared for me to quit, except the apartment.



So, I started packing. Rolf came home to console me and he finished packing. This happened on a Wednesday night and we somehow managed to:

1. Pack all our things

2. Pack all our things into the rental car

3. Find a fabulous apartment, twice as big, in a better area, in the city center, with a brand new kitchen, a huge patio, high ceilings, brand new bathroom, and two bedrooms

4. Drive to Erlangen to spend the weekend before the move in date

By Friday at 3pm.



We make a great team, Rolf and I.



So, in reality those assholes did us a favor even though it was their clear intent to screw us over as much as possible.



We spent Friday night watching The Office and drinking champagne. Doesn't get much better than that.



After I had hung up on the father, I haven't heard a single word from them. Surprise, surprise.



And just so you know...We intentionally left the apartment in better condition than when we had moved in. I'm positive they'll get what they deserve, but it won't come from me.



I'll post pictures as soon as we move into our first, real apartment. We're both very excited.

The chaos has yet to settle. It seems to be one thing after another! Living in Munich still seems to be a dusty haze with no end in sight. Although, Rolf and I are having fun exploring the city and finding places to dance and eat and shop! I've always enjoyed grocery shopping for some reason and I really love it here. Just like in Thailand, there are many street vendors that sell fresh fruits, all kinds of breads, and wieners!!! Even though everything in Deutschland is outrageously expensive (at least with my US dollar), the groceries are relatively cheap. Just another reason for me to love grocery shopping.

Germans are generally very healthy eaters, minus the excessive beer consumption. All the foods in the grocer are fresh and the bananas look like normal bananas...You may wonder..What does a "normal" banana look like? Well, I can tell you what it doesn't look like and that's exactly how they look in the States. Well above average in size, bright yellow, and the picture of genetically engineered agriculture. I can taste the difference here. There isn't half of the store dedicated to frozen food items; in fact, they seem to be pretty hard to find. Not like I have been looking....People here go food shopping bi-weekly if not daily for fresh food items. I think I like that better than stock-up-for-Y2K, Costco style shopping. On Saturdays everything has to be cleared out of the store, because here NOTHING is open on Sundays. It can be something inconvenient, but I appreciate the intention behind it. I think that American culture could benefit from less stores being open around the clock. People need to rest!

I have yet to really become a German eater....Stereotypically speaking...I don't drink beer with every meal and I don't accompany my beer with bratwurst...It's not really like that here...Sure, people drink beer at the crack of dawn, but there is more Italian food and Greek food more than I see "German" food. The Backerai is what really gets me. The bread and the sweet rolls and the pretzels and, ok you get the idea. I have officially replaced my daily Starbucks with a Krapfen. It's a little bit more messy than a latte though. Imagine me walking around the city with white powder sugar and purple custard covering every bit my face except for my eyes. If you have any idea now about what exactly a Krapfen is...... Did I mention that we love the Greek restaurant around the corner from our apartment?

One thing that contradicts my statement about Germans being generally healthy is the fact that a large population are smokers. People can live their lives however they want and maybe I sound very American for my opinion of people who smoke...BUT, I have to breathe too! During my break at my language class, dozens of people cluster right outside the door to puff. I get caught up in cloud of smoke when I try to find my way to the Krapfen stand. Sure, I can hold me breath and it's not that big of a deal, but then when I return from my bakery ecstasy I am confronted with a massacare of cigarette buds. What gives them the right to litter just because they are smokers? This is a question I ask.

Another thing about Germans which is stereotypically attributed to them is the fact that they love to complain....i.e. my last paragraph.....It's true and I think it's funny. Now that I can understand a fair amount of German words, I can hear people as I go through my day complaining about their cat, the weather, the subway, the stale Krapfen......If there is something to talk about, then there is surely something to complain about.

I had expected Germans to be as organized as I had been led to believe. It's true that Germans are very punctual and concerned about time and it being wasted and lost and not spent efficiently.....Although, I'm beginning to think that the supposed "order" in their culture is a facade. I was dicussing this with the Slavic nun in my language class. Here it is: Things are organized in a very particular fashion and when the smallest of the smallest things go wrong or just waiver from the directed course, all hell breaks loose. That is when Germans become everything but orderly and organized. Things only work and will only work the way they were made to work. Whether or not there might be another way that is better is beside the point. The organization that Germans feel the need to have is almost a disadvantage. There are four pens. They are all different colors. The black pen is what is used by your average German. The red pen, the green pen, and the blue pen are just there to take up space and are not considered as potential writing tools because only the black pen is meant to be used in all occassions. The black pen runs out of ink. (This is the part where Germans fall apart) Since the black pen is the only one that is designated to be used for every purpose and it is now dry of ink, there is nothing that can be done and no other options could be employed. The black pen was the only option. How about the other three pens????? That wasn't in the original organizational plan....So das ist kaputt! And then everyone is left complaining about the black pen that failed the system. This is the analogy that I have for Germans and their cultural tendancy for organization ( or that which they believe is such )

So that is my cultural impression rant....Hope it makes sense to you and you don't take my personal opinion for face value :)

I signed up for another month of intensive classes. I'm officially an A1 level German speaker, reader, and writer now. I go to class for 3 hours per day, 5 days per week. I have to say, even after successfully completing my BA degree, I have never studied so hard. I honestly feel as though my head might just explode and litter the street with a butchered foreign language. They are not lying when they call this course "intensive"....I have even been dreaming in German! I love every second of it though. Today, I had a full one hour conversation in entirely Deutsch. Sure, it probably sounded like nails down a chalkboard in terms of grammar, but I can make myself understood and I'm surprised by how much information actually found its way into my brain. But, like I said, I enrolled for another month long course and I have every intention to keep at it until I reach a fluent level. This is an investment in my education!

Rolf will not be going to Italy (yay! ) The project did not materialize for several reasons and so he is working on a project for Greece and it so far has held priority at the office and has been very demanding. He comes home late, but this is what he wanted and even though he complains, I know he loves it.

That is the update for now...I will end now before this gets too long and everyone decides to stop reading this blog because of its unnecessary length. Chao!

Muenchen!

I really had expected the month of January to be exceptionally hectic....But, I didn't realize that the chaos would only intensify and bleed into the month of February, too. Life has been busy for Rolf and I here on KleinStr. We complain and groan, but I think we both love every bit of the frenzy. That's just who we are. It really hasn't been all that long since I last wrote an entry, but it feels like years have passed in between then and now. I'm not sure where to begin with the storytelling.....

I have been on a crash course of integration in the last couple of weeks. I'm learning all the subways stops and what places are best for fresh fruit, shortcuts through tunnels and how to park in a city where there is virtually no parking available. I'm driving.....The nicest car I have ever been in before....An Audi A8....Look it up....It's freaking sweet. The list of features are more than I can name and I get to pack kiddos in it! Car seats, too! Every Audi A8 needs car seats, right?! I drive all over the city picking the kids up and taking them to their different activities. Already I'm becoming very familiar with the city and Rolf has admitted his envy. Just the other day, he accidentlly took the wrong train and ended up losing about 2 hours of time trying to get back to where he started only to miss the appointment he was trying to make. Besides learning city routes, I have started my German language intensive course! I didn't realize how much I miss being school and taking notes....I love to take notes. I've been soaking up as much as possible and trying to keep my mind clean of negative thoughts like: This is so hard or why the hell aren't there rules for plural nouns?.......I like the heavy load of information and I'm surprised at how well I'm doing, considering my last classroom setting attempt at learning a language. I took 3 years of French and I can only remember how difficult it was for me! I realize how important it is to have a fresh perspective on things. Rolf and I are essentially settled here in our apartment. We bought the things that we needed and replaced the God-awful toilet seat, we figured out how to work the damn laundry machine, and found out where the trash goes....We had several bags sitting the apartment for a few days because we couldn't find the community trash bins.....We found places to get our hair cut and discovered a great restaurant around the corner that we are becoming regulars at. We had our first weekend together this past weekend and used the opportunity to explore the city and party! The club scene is outrageous here.....Bars and clubs don't close until the last person leaves. We were out until 5am and took a Mercedes taxicab home....All the taxis here are Mercedes.....What we view in America as luxury, is just plain normal Jane here. The Italian designers, the posh cars, leather and fur. It's just a part of the culture. I'm not sure if I mentioned the culture shock in previous blogs that I have experienced quite surprisingly, but that has pretty much subsided. German people are a unique type......Some people I run into are very receptive, while others are simply not. It's not that they are trying to be rude, but Germans have a different approach to strangers and how they view time. That is, there is never enough of it, so there certainly is no time to acknowledge the existence of strangers strolling, rather racing past. I have met some of my neighbors who are very friendly and immediatley wanted to have Rolf and I over for drinks. Once Rolf and I get the chance to check out the salsa scene here, I imagine we will be able to make friends very easily.

Rolf and I have not only been getting settled into the new apartment and our jobs, but also organzing our personal life. We have begun training for our half marathon in Sweden and I have begun to "deal" with running in 20C degree weather and snow. Actually, the snow has not been around for about a week now. It's still very cold, but the sun is out and that makes running at 6am in the dark a bit easier. If it was up to me, I would not be sticking to a training schedule, but Rolf has been quite diligent and motivating. We are music lovers and we will see our first concert in Deutschland this Sunday....Shinedown....They're an American band...Maybe you're familiar. We went last night to see a movie....Yes, I know, boring.....BUT, they serve beer in the theaters! That is German, no? Das bier ist gut!

Munich Bound

We have been very busy the last few days...Actually, we have been busy since we arrived here in Germany. Sandra, Rolf's sister, came from Switzerland to stay with us for the weekend (That is her in the picture above). I was so pleased to meet her and I enjoyed the time we spent getting to know one another. I showed her around Erlangen and the three of us took a day trip to Nurnberg to savor some gluwein. We went out for drinks and stopped by the famous schnitzel haus for a feast of a meal. Literally, you cannot see your plate because the scnitzel is overflowing off of the plate(Photo at the bottom)! On Monday, we packed up what we could in Sandra's car and headed south for Munich. We officially moved into our little apartment on Kleinstrasse! We spent a few hours arranging and rearranging furniture and then contemplating what things we would need to replace, i.e. toaster circa 1914 and a sunset toilet seat. For now, the space is optimized and we can enjoy the view we have from the third floor. It snowed yesterday and it was solid white outside with huge snowflakes falling. It was beautiful and I think that was the second time in my life that I have even seen snowfall. To celebrate our first night we ate at an adorable and quaint Greek restaurant around the corner and then negotiated a price for a bottle of champagne that we later spilled all over the floor when we uncorked the bottle......
I have started work....I started shadowing that is.....I follow the parents around as they perform the duties that I will take over once I know what the hell I am doing. I will be driving here and I'm most concerned about knowing my way around the city. I have to pick the kids up from school (which are on the opposite sides of the city), take them to tennis lessons (which are at two different locations), and manage not to get lost and stay on time. I still have to pass a German language proficiency test for my visa and iron out several other details that will follow with the visa procedure.
Besides that stuff.....German culture.....Now, I lived in Thailand for over a year and had virtually no culture shock...I obviously did not mentally prepare myself in the same way I had before because here I have experienced a great deal of culture shock. Ironic, considering German and American culture are more similar than different. In Thailand, if I spoke even one word of Thai, I would receive praise and encouragement. Here, if I TRY to speak the little German that I know, it's perceived as unimpressive and just plain not enough. I've run into people who would like to practice their English with me and others who refuse to even exchange gestures because the of the language barrier. When I smile at people as I walk through the streets, people become confused because that is not so typical here in Germany to acknowledge strangers. I have began staring at the ground as I walk. Money is a bitch, too. The exchange rate is so bad, I lose 30 bucks for every 100 that I spend. Money has fallen through my hands like sand and I am anxious to start receiving Euro once I officially begin work. At least our apartment is paid for. But it doesn't feel good to lose that much money that I had to earn back when I was in the States. It's all part of the transition and Rolf has been by my side this whole time to help ease.....uncomfortable feelings about such matters.
I did have one particular special experience recently. I was introduced to Rolf's landlords in Erlangen. They were an older couple who invited us right in to sit down and chat about modern politics. He wore suspenders and a plaid scarf, and she wore an apron. She showed me her collection of traditional, hand-carved carousals and pictures of the grandkids. He showed me beer steins from the brewery that they own together and talked to me in German even though I had no idea and he knew I had no idea what he was saying to me. I admired their home and felt as though I was getting a window into the culture that I will soon become a part of.

We have arrived succussfully and with all of our luggage! At the Nurnburg airport, we picked up our Audi rental and drove out to Erlangen to get settled in our apartment. In the last couple of days before Rolf returned back to work, we managed to fit a lot of activities in. Such as getting buck naked and heading out to the local sauna with dozens of other buck naked Europeans. Buck naked in the snow and in negative degrees and with BARE feet! People are NOT shy here about their bodies....spread eagle! Really though, it was beautiful and something like a winter wonderland and with such cold temps, the sauna really hit the spot. We took the train out to Nurnburg to do some sightseeing for the day and to shop! The shopping here in Germany is out of this world. Rich wools, soft leathers, tailored silks, and shining jewels. This could be a problem. Especially with the terrible exchange rate...I'm trying to adjust. We went salsa dancing with some of Rolf's friends and tore up the dance floor. Our goal was to show-off and I think that we managed.
My first impressions of Germany is that it's COLD! I'm wearing something like 3 full layers of clothes. Two pairs of socks, long johns, jeans, tank top, shirt, sweater, jacket, scarf, 2 layers of gloves, ear muffs, and snow boots. Slowly, I have cut back slightly and I feel as though I'm beginning to get used to the weather. First, I was dreaded going outside...We walk everywhere and I didn't necessarily look forward to that, but now I can go without gloves. It's progress. I also successfully navigated myself through the city of Munich on our first trip there. I was alone because Rolf was at work. I spent the day hopping subway trains and exploring the city. I found everything that I set out to find and still made it on time to my appointment with my host family! I finally met them and the kiddos! The kids are darling and very fluent in English. The little girl is four (Lorraine) and the little boy is seven (Lucas). Verena and Sascha seem to be wonderful people who are very willing to help me with anything that I might need. Our meeting was pleasant and I finally feel a sense of relief because I had been very stressed about finding work and getting a visa to stay here. I got to see the apartment that Rolf and I will be living in once we move to Munich and it's so cute! Small, but has just enough space for the two of us city dwellers. It's about 100 yards (I'm still not on the metric system) from the subway and it's in a quiet part of the city. The apartment is also located one subway stop away from Rolf's work! We have a big patio and lots of trees to look out at. I have the keys and we will move to Munich next week. During that week, I will slowly be taking over my job responsibilities and learning how to drive here. I will be learning how to drive in Munich with only the finest German vehicle......A brand new Mercedes SUV.
Rolf's work has been exciting for him, too. He loves his new office and he says that his new boss is someone he can really enjoy working for. He already has accepted a short-term assignment in Vienna. He is there now and left this morning, but only for a couple of days. He will begin his designated assignment in February which is in Milan, Itlay. For three weeks out of each month, he will be working there and then spend the last week in Munich. We don't know for how many months it will go on like this, but it may be for the full duration of the 8 months. I'm not so hot for that prospect, but this means I can visit Italy on the weekends!
Sandra, Rolf's sister, will visit us from Swizterland this weekend. This will be the first of three family members to meet. We're excited to host her stay and I'm looking forward to meeting her.
I should probably practice my German......

Next stop: Erlangen

We are ready to leave, so we thought it's about time to give you guys a little preview of Germany ;-). These pictures were taken in February 2007, when Rolf first moved to Erlangen. The beer cellars are right around the corner of his apartment and in May, there is always a big beer fest - the "Bergkirchweih". The next picture shows the main street (Hauptstraße) which leads to the apartment. Currently, it is 23 degrees (-5°C) over there - let's hope, it's not getting much colder...

Departure: January 6th 2009

We have begun packing and donating and everything else that must be done for a move across the Atlantic. Our plane takes off at 6am on Tuesday morning from SMF airport and we will arrive in Germany on the 7th around lunch time. First we will be living in Erlangen which is about an hour away from Munich which is where Rolf's apartment is. Sometime in January we will be moving to an apartment in Munich furnsihed by my employer. I will be working for a German family as an au pair starting in February. Rolf will also be working in Munich with Siemens and traveling to Italy for his third and last assignment. We will already be expecting one visitor within our first month. His sister, Sandra, will come and stay with us for a week. She will be coming from Switzerland where she lives and works. The month will keep us very busy with moving, starting new jobs, visa arrangements, learning a language, and Rolf will be getting back in contact with many of his friends. I imagine a very structured chaos and a whirlwind of excitement!